Punch a ‘TERF’?

I can’t believe I’m actually having to write this, but judging by all the blocks I’ve got on Twitter for merely expressing how its wrong to hit people, I think I probably should. First, some context.



At an anti-trans talk hosted by ‘TERFs’ and featuring anti-trans speakers, a woman was attacked by pro-trans people. We do not know if the attackers were trans, we do not know if they were AntiFa and we do not know who they were, other than that they came from the pro-trans side of the argument. There are many rumours but nothing is confirmed.

The woman, Maria, approached the pro-trans side to film faces and intimidate people. Anti-trans people, especially in the madfem sphere, have a penchant for doxxing trans people and trying to get them fired from their jobs etc. So yes I absolutely do count what she was doing as an intimidation tactic. However, when Maria was a few steps away – clearly annoyed at said intimidation tactic a pro-trans person ran out of the crowd and tried to snatch her camera. Maria got in closer to try and film the face of the person who did it, at which point cardboard goes up to block her view, some slaps are thrown to Maria’s arm and then a scuffle breaks out.

The scuffle breaks out because a young woman has grabbed hold of Maria’s camera – which is apparently attached to Maria’s wrist via wrist strap. The scuffle continues, and moves across the square a little until you can very clearly hear the camera being thrown to the ground and bouncing off with a lot of momentum. This was very clearly intentional property damage. At this point Maria has now got the young woman in a very loose headlock, its barely even a headlock looking at it – though this image is the one being circulated amongst trans people, ignoring everything which led up to that point.

The scuffle ends with the original instigator of the incident, the person who originally tried to snatch Maria’s camera, running in from off screen to hit Maria repeatedly. In the hurdle of people Maria is pushed to the ground, her grip on the young woman released, and the two pro-trans people who started this incident run away into the distance, followed by their apathetic friend who schleps after them.


This is a faithful and accurate telling of the events – anyone telling you otherwise is either misinformed or lying to you intentionally. Send them this post and correct them. This doesn’t mean all trans people or people who support our rights are inherently violent, it just means two assholes did some asshole stuff and they should be called assholes for doing it.


So is it okay to punch a TERF?








No. No it isn’t. When you punch someone, much like with the Richard Spencer punches that I commented on – you create sympathy for the devil. Thousands of people are going to see those clips and think “fuck, this is awful, how do I help this lady?” The world has largely started turning against AntiFa because of their use of violence for political gain, and they will turn against trans people too if they see many of us are advocating for violence. We can’t allow that to happen, we need to condemn the violence and support those who are victimised by anyone – for any reason.

and trust me… I get it… when I started Twitter & blogging just over a year ago, I encountered the TERFs pretty early on. I had about 30 followers and hundreds of them were flooding my notifications because I had the audacity to say I was a woman. That isn’t the worst of it though… they genuinely made me feel really bad about myself. They kept sending me links and information and stuff, concern-trolling me into self doubt, and it worked. I really did feel pretty awful, I felt like maybe they were right, maybe I am violence, maybe I am sick, maybe I am disgusting – they had all this evidence which proved it right? So how could they be wrong?

This is gaslighting 101, and it can have some pretty awful effects on the old brains. In extreme and prolonged cases it can cause complex post traumatic stress disorder – which differs from PTSD in that PTSD is often about a singular event or period of trauma, rather than constant trauma over a longer period of time. I’m not saying I have C-PTSD, but I have a few mental issues from trauma already so it wasn’t difficult for me to start feeling a little messed up inside because of what they were saying and a common symptom of C-PTSD is rage turned outwards – the destruction of property or use of violence.


I got banned a lot when I had my first few accounts. My current account is account number 7. The others were partly banned due to mass reporting by TERFs, but they were also banned as part of my rage turned outwards, I was a total bitch. I called them all morons and idiots and retards and whatever the heck else I could think of. It was spicy as heck. It was also very much the wrong way to go about solving these problems, I’ve learnt that over this year and its something I want to try and empower other trans people with. Violence isn’t the answer, knowledge is power here.

See, the studies etc that they posted me were all horribly misrepresented, or just outright lies from anti-trans bloggers. The most famous of which I’ve ran into repeatedly is the Karolinska Institute study, which apparently claims we’re all violent and suicidal because transition is a terrible way to deal with dysphoria. That’s not at all what the study actually says, but they post it all the time anyway – even despite the author of it coming out to say “hey wait a minute, you’re being idiots. stop.”

The only way I managed to overcome their bullshit was to read more about it, to learn more about my own condition and form real counter arguments to their crap. I can’t be gaslit by people if I’m aware of them going to the attic to flicker the lights (obscure reference to the origins of the term gaslighting dw about it.) Much like an illusion or magic trick it becomes slightly less cool when you know how its done, and it can’t give you that same effect any more. This is how we beat the TERFs, not with physical violence, but with our minds – the very thing they want to deny us. Trans people need to read more, they need to talk to other trans people and share counter-arguments to TERF bullshit, this is what a trans community should be, and I hope that I’m curating that kind of environment with my blog and Twitter feed – and YouTube channel soon.

As always, my DMs are open, so if you’re being harassed and abused by TERFs and want someone to come help you counter their arguments I’ll be around. At the very least I can send you studies and resources which counter their claims. And I’m possibly going to add a page on here with some of the sources I commonly cite as counterpoints to their arguments so you can access them quickly and easily yourself.


tldr stop hitting people, start reading.


14 thoughts on “Punch a ‘TERF’?

  1. ramendik says:

    All this. And more.

    The act was directly self-defeating. So obviously self-defeating that I posted a version about a right-wing plant first. I retracted that when it because clear the beating was not severe; a right-wing plant would do a severe one, ensuring greater media coverage.

    That “debate” was an obscure closed event somewhere close to Hyde Park. Nobody outside a few “circles” would even know about it. Thanks to the violence, it has made some national and, to a degree, world media. The TERFs got a lot of free exposure for that punch! The trans people got nothing.

    I now think the entire situation was mishandled from the start. I get “not debating” in case you do not want to help the other side raise its profile. But then don’t go raising its profile in other ways, for example by protesting it! As it happened, the protest and especialli the violence in it did far more to raise TERF profile than the event itself ever could, even in the original location.

    This should not have been a protest at all. This should have been a positive event celebrating trans diversity.

    I see the cries that the TERFs are not playing fair and undermining people’s lives. Well then, one does not have to play fair. Perhaps the trans event should have included a debate of its own (say. regarding the balance of medical transsexual and social transgender issues). The TERF event should not get a mention.

    This would have the effect of diverting public attention and possibly diverting some genuinely neutral attendees who just heard there is a “trans debate”. Yes, a spoiler event. An underhanded tactic but not a violent one. And also one at least potentially working to defeat TERFs, not to boost them as this one did.

    And then we must always remember what the TERFs really are, politically speaking. A support squad giving a faction of the Right “feminist cred”. The Right just loves the narrative of the violent “SJWs”. This played right into their hand.


  2. Chris Hearn says:

    Yup. Political violence is a dead end street. That violence is how I discovered this whole TERF vs Anti TERF battle. To be honest there are some who are labeled TERF who really do make good points and I can understand their position. At the same time bombarding a person with hateful or outright false information is just plain ridiculous. So, I’m sorry to see this has happened to you. Never doubt your worth in this world. Just be who you are.


  3. Willow says:

    There was no headlock, not even a loose one. If you look carefully at the footage, Maria has her hand on the person’s shoulder and her arm is nowhere near the neck. That’s not a headlock.


  4. Pop says:

    When you’re in a side of a protest or whatever, and you see the other side getting closer, despite your full knowledge that you can beat them, you should know something’s up. My position is that I have zero sympathy for anyone provoking or begging to get beaten. This story portrays this woman in exactly that light. Fuck her. She could’ve walked away. She chose not to. She played a decisive part in her beating.

    It’s not entirely unreasonable to say she actually wanted to get hit. That justifies her cause. “Trans people and their advocates are all deranged, violent animals”. I swear there’s racists who wish someone of a different race did something bad to them, just to justify the way they feel about the world. Like a white supremacist wishing to be robbed by a black man, or black people with a death-by-cop wish. Those people must exist and she’s one of them.

    Beating her made her side stronger, just like black people beating white racists makes white racism stronger. That isn’t to say it’s wrong to do it – beatings rarely fall out of the sky (Richard Spencer is a weird case). If someone’s provoking you and you act on their provocation… they’re just as in the wrong as you are. You’ve just shown weakness. You’ve let yourself get provoked and you’ve served their cause.

    On that level, it’s absolutely wrong. It’s harmful to your cause. But beating someone who obviously wants to get beaten… nah. That’s not wrong. You’re giving them exactly what they’re craving, and you’re harming yourself in the process. Hell, that’s rather selfless.


    • Willow says:

      Wow, I’m really impressed with your mind reading skills there. Knowing exactly what Maria’s intentions were when she was filming the crowd and how much she was aware of the danger she was about to encounter. Knowing she ‘obviously wants to get beaten’. That’s really impressive! This is victim blaming.

      Also, I seriously doubt there are any black people who want to experience ‘death-by-cop’.


    • ramendik says:

      So you SEE that they harmed their cause. But not just “themselves” really. They harmed all trans people and all who just want a more free society. They pushed the TERF “debate”, which was really a quaint closed club, into the national media! And that is not terribly wrong just how?

      I don’t want to guess her motives. She was not “asking to be beaten”, she by actions may have been somewhat provocative but not to the extent justifying physical violence. They could just hold cardboard before camera.


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