I got in another argument with Blaire White recently and well, in the end I decided to run a poll just to survey the opinions of trans around Twitter. I asked a few people to RT from around the tranny twitosphere and honestly I think we got a good amount of people involved. Heck, we had even more than some of the scientific studies on trans folk.
Now let me be clear, I by no means think that these polls are in any way conclusive, or even accurate to any degree. Though it would be super cool to get some actual scientific data and properly survey trans people on their opinions. I know some people in gender clinics in the UK and I might try and do it, but for now here’s what I think of the results we got.
First poll asked Would you like to have transitioned earlier? 74% voted see results, 17% yes and 9% no. Discounting the 74% from the 593 we’re left with 154.18 – of which 83.81 voted yes and 44,37 who voted now. Almost double were in favour of earlier transitions for themselves, which I kinda expected to be honest.
This doesn’t entirely back up my position on puberty blockers though unfortunately, there’s no telling what age the voters transitioned at, no telling how happy they are with their transitions now, or whether they’re MtF or FtM. All of this information is really important to know to draw any real conclusions from this poll. But it was fun to do.
What it does do is warrant more investigation, and I intend to present this blog post to the gender clinics across the UK with a survey. Hopefully they will be happy to help and distribute the survey amongst their patients and patient groups – preferably the ones who are already post-transition. Though I’ll include controls for that in the survey once I’ve properly had chance to think about the questions.
Second poll asked If there was a pill that would cure GD sans transition – would you have taken it pre-transition? Which I think is a far deeper conversation to be had amonst trans people. A poll can’t really do it justice, as there’s a lot of nuance. Would be awesome to hear what prominent YouTube trans people like Yorrick, Blaire, Theryn Meyer, Zinnia Jones, Riley Jay Dennis, Milo Stewart all had to say about it. I think there would be a lot of diversity to the answers. So hopefully I can persuade some of them to have the conversation on their channels.
At first my response was that I think if I was pre-transition I would have taken the pill. For me the dysphoria is the reason I transitioned, I’m just doing my best to live without it. Yet I also get this little nagging feeling in the back of my head. I began medical transition at around 21, but by then I had already almost entirely socially transitioned – I just hadn’t told anyone about it at all. It’s hard to really tell when dysphoria had properly taken control of my life and shaped me into the person I am today.
I remember as far back as 14 looking up gender dysphoria and feeling everything click together. I remember that feeling of well everything just started to make a whole lot more sense and I can’t help feel that my inaction back then caused further repression and lead to me being such a disastrous mess for the remainder of my teen years.
Or even before then when I used to change in toilet cubicles because I felt my body was wrong and didn’t want anyone else to see it.
The question stopped being about curing dysphoria somewhat and started being more about what the impact on my life that would be. Heck yeah, without a doubt I don’t want dysphoria, but if I’d have taken this pill at 10 – my life would be so much different to if I’d taken it at 14, and that would be so much different to taking it at 19.
It really speaks to the insidious and far reaching nature of dysphoria in my opinion. Its too easy and heck, preferential, to look at dysphoria as just small and about certain parts of ourselves. Its just genital dysphoria, its just dysphoria about my height, its just dysphoria about my shoulder size, you know the common phrases. The compartmentalisation makes it way easier to tackle each problem. Its very rare that you get to take a step back and see just how big and interconnected the problem really is. That’s what this poll did for me.
My answered has wavered a little, but I think that ultimately I would still rather be rid of dysphoria. As it stands I still experience it and some days worse than others. It sucks to constantly be on guard about it. If the alternative was me but pre-trans and without dysphoria at all? I think counting the pros and cons of it the pros definitely come out on top.
How about you?